Hustle ‘n Flow

So, the overall lesson I learned this week is: It’s hard out here for a pimp.

This lesson spans across life in general and is applicable to almost any situation. And here, in BA, pimp life has become pretttty brutal. Below are just some of the instances in which the life of a pimp has been made noticeably more difficult.

1) The Club. It’s official. I didn’t think China and Argentina had much in common, but now I see–Argentines must kill their female babies at birth. The male to female ratio at any given boliche on any given night is at least 10:1. Pretty bad odds for an aspiring pimp. Um, so why do I go to NYU again? I guess the next lesson I’ve learned this week, one that is directly correlative to knowing how hard a pimp’s life is here, is that you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife. Kidding. Not really. Yes I am kidding. No I’m really not, but you know what I mean. (http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/judy-grimes-just-kidding/239665/)

2) ALFA 2000. Pimp-Life, in general, for both males and females has been greatly impeded at Residencia ALFA 2000 because of the presence of Ronaldo, the night doorman who thinks all Americans are terrorists/nazis/communists/piles of throw up/amoebas/living cancer. This man has vowed to single-handedly bring down any and all action that looks like fun. Or even things that don’t even look like fun but could possibly, maybe, probably not, but may have the slightest chance of being enjoyable. My friends want to bring glass bottles of Tang to their rooms. But Ronaldo says…sorry, no clanking. You’re clanking the glass, and that’s rude. I’m leaving my room to go out with my friends for the night, and I cough. Sorry, no coughing. Coughing isn’t silence, and you need to be silent. In the dark. Sit in the dark and be silent. What’s your room number? Be silent. Tell me your name and your room number! No, be silent, what are you doing?? Ronaldo–it’s on. You obviously haven’t watched Bon Qui Qui yet. Americans willll cuuutttt youuu.

3) The Shantytown. Ok first off, there really are shantytowns here. And they’re pretty much a block away from the million dollar apartments. So they look even more shanty-ish. Not only do people live in these shantytowns (which I wanted to get a picture of, but didn’t want to get cuuuttt), but these people also are obsessed with Paco. And Paco is a big bitch. Paco, all the rage for the underprivileged and underage (they start using around age 7 or 8), costing a wopping 1 peso (35 cents USD), is made from remnants of the leaves used to make cocaine, bits of glass, and other miscellaneous items. Paco is worse than crack, and causes brain damage in less than 6 months. Needless to say, I think I’ll stick to good ol’ time-tested vodka y naranja. Check out this clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJqaILd0iQA

***People and Places around BA:

Wednesday night (Lindsay’s birthday!!) at Museo. Cab driver tried to tell Mike and me every single one of our bills was fake, and offered to drive us to the bank. What a thoughtful swindler. Nice try. Another Thursday Night at Lost. Best DJ ever? Yes. At least 5 fights broke out. It was awesome. I may or may not have been the last person to leave. It also may or may not have been light outside? Aroma has the best damn ham sandwich ever. I didn’t anticipate a cold spell, so now I can’t go outside. Argentina plays in the qualifiers for the world cup today.

Taxi to Museo

Feliz Cumpleaños, Lindsay

Museo

Ronaldo, rude. I will cut you.

Fight 1, I got a beer poured on me.

Lost

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